Homesick

I have been so freaking homesick for the past couple of weeks. I miss my family, my pets, the mountains, my car, marching band, chorus...Everything!! And it's just even more upsetting because most everyone here has gone home at least once or twice while me and my roommate live too far away to even think of visiting. It just seems so unfair! I thought everyone here would be away from home and happy to be gone, but everyone got homesick and went home. I get homesick and have to stay here. :(

But Zach has a thing at Liberty next weekend and offered to take me home. I'm really considering it, but I also feel bad for my roommate. Because we've both been complaining about being stuck here and then I get a way out. But I'm really stinking homesick. I even miss stupid Liberty University!

I've never been the kind of person to get homesick, but I've been so upset about it lately. I think it's more the fact that everyone else has the resources to go home and I don't.

And none of my friends who are at most an hour away have offered to visit me. A lot of people have had friends visit (or at least offer!). I feel so alone. :/

But anyways. I'm still having fun at college, it's just that Family Weekend is coming up and it makes me sad to think about stuff like that.

Good & Bad

So college has been just plain awesome so far! I really love college and the people in my suite and the clubs I'm in, etc. But to act like college is all fun and games would be very unfair of me.

It IS a lot more work. I have to write more notes, do more homework, and the reading is so much harder. I got a 75 on my first Bio quiz and a 60 on my first Philosophy one. But once you realize that you're doing badly, it jumpstarts you. I plan on studying a lot more and spending less time (hopefully) on the internet. I got a 100 on my second Bio quiz. but I think I may have done quite poorly on my first Stats test. I had a major brainfart and could not figure out two of the questions. Arghhh. So at best I got an 80. :(

But I really like the people and the movies and time spent with friends.

Although I've really gotten homesick. I miss knowing where stuff is, who people are, etc. I feel like a small fish in an ocean. I really just want to go home and cuddle with my cat (who returned home after being gone for 2 weeks). And I miss Chorus with FunSized. And band. And even my old Spanish class. :(

In other news, my family came down this past weekend and we all went to see Pastor Ken. He was so funny when he realized we were in the church. He just kept saying , "Wow!" And I wanted to cry from happiness. It was like finally realizing the past two months of tears were worth it!

Okay, I have to leave in 30 minutes for Spanish where I will hopefully find out how I did on my first examen!

And of course, today is the 8th anniversary of September 11th. Never forget. <3

Oh hey...

I'm at college!

...and I've been here for about 9 days now. Heh... I apologize for the lack of updates, but I've been super busy! I've been doing all the freshman stuff hanging out with new people, and then classes started Monday so everything's been pretty crazy. I've managed to keep up with all my classes so far but waking up for MWF 8 AM has been really rough. I've overslept both times so far. But I'm not going to tomorrow! Or at least, I don't plan to.

I'm hungry and want dinner. Numm.

And I had a major Miley Cyrus jamfest laast night with my roomie! It was hilarious! :)

I love my living situation. It worked out perfectly. Except for the creepers across the hallway. xD

Oh, college. How I love thee!

Barely a Birthday

So my birthday was yesterday! I finally turned 18!

On Friday, Fun-sized all came over and we ate lots of sugar and watched Pride & Prejudice together. We kept "aww-ing" so much, haha. Mr. Darcy! And we all wore plaid shorts. Unplanned, of course.

On Saturday, I woke up and ate breakfast. Then we went shopping for bedding for college. And hen dinner with some family to meet mt uncle's girlfriend and her daughter. They both seem really nice/awesome.

And today I had church and more being lazy. With the bro updating the iPod.

I have one day left in this town. Whaaaaat?

Realizations and a Resolution

So I had another cryfest last night. But it was tears of happiness, tears of JOY. I had realized how lucky I was-- how lucky I AM-- and began crying.

I have all my immeadiate family members alive and well. I have good friends. My future roommate is really cool and super nice. I'm going to a good college. My family can afford to SEND ME to a good college. I have 4 loving (if stupid) pets. I have my own room (for another week, lol) and a bed and sheets and blankets and pillows. I can take a shower every day with clean water. I can brush my teeth and use mouthwash and eat 3 meals a freaking day. I have a loving church family and plenty of friends. I am truly BLESSED. <3

And I have made a resolution. There will be no good-byes when I leave. Only, "See you later!"

:D

Happy August!

I've been in Florida since Friday and that's why I haven't updated in a while. I still love you blog, no worries. :)

So I found out my roommate! And I didn't get tripled, thank goodness. I feel like all the college stuff is just bam bam bam! Like, everything's coming together really fast.

My birthday is in 9 days as of now. I will finally finally FINALLY be legal!

Oh joyous times.

I move in August 18th. <3

Odd Sleeping Habits

So it's really late and I should probably be in bed but I'm not. Because last night I slept really....strangely and I thought it'd be a good idea to blog about it!

Well, I was pretty tired last night because I've been working all week and I've had my church's vacation bible school. So I was tired and had music playing and finally sort of fell asleep. But the whole night was like an out-of-body experience. I was aware of my body lying there, and it felt like my body was absorbing the music and the sleep. I didn't really lose consciousness until I think 2 am...but I had been "sleeping" since midnight. It was very...odd. Like I wasn't awake or asleep, just....existing.

I'm weird.

You should check out: "Still Miss Us" by Damien Leith

<3

VBS Craziness!

Sorry I haven't posted a proper blog post in so long. I've been so busy with my job and my church's vacation bible school started Sunday night and I've been leading the 3rd-5th graders so I'm tired.

But our group is known as the Radical Rock Climbers! Woop woop! We're pretty....radical. xD

But I really do love those kids. I get so many hugs and attacks and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. <3

And the songs are really good this year! I like 'em I like 'em. :D

And my mom has walking pneumonia. I told her to go to the doctor! But does she listen? Nooo. but anyways. I'm off!

July Quotes

I've decided that I'll post a blog once a month with quotes that I have fallen in love with or that have deep meaning behind them or are just plain humorous. So I'll go ahead and post one and update everytime I find a new one. :)

"You can spend the rest of your life with me. But I can't spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on-- alone. That's the curse of the Time Lords."
-- The Tenth Doctor

"You can't love me! Our babies would be dogs!"
-- Sophia

"There are better things to do today. Dying can wait."
-- The Face of Boe

Change 2.0

All of those changes I was just scared about are in full effect now. Last weekend was our pastor's first Sunday at the church. People are already getting stuff for college, preparing to move out. I'm in tears just thinking about it. Everything, everything, everything. It's all changing and there's no stopping it. I've been crying nonstop it seems lately.

The other night, I was trying to go to sleep while listening to music (as I always do) and as soon as I shut my eyes and listened to the music, I started sobbing uncontrollably. And it wasn't even a song that meant anything! It was just a regular old song, and I broke down because of it. I obviously failed to sleep and had to turn all music off. I tried listening to happy ones, upbeat ones-- but they all made me cry harder. I don't know whyyyyyyy.

Bdubs, I'm offically obsessed with Doctor who. And the adorable couple of Ten/Rose. And I've been watching depressing tributes to them on YouTube. SO FREAKING HEARTBREAKING.

Behind These Hazel Eyes

That's not cliche at ALL....but moving on.

I never really thought about it until my biological grandfather died a few months ago (long story), but I'm the only one out of all my cousins that doesn't have blue eyes. I was just sort of in awe when I first realized this because I mean, what are the chances?! But then I became jealous and furious. I love blue eyes. I'm jealous of everyone who has them. My brother has them, a lot of my friends have them, and all the other kids in my family have them. Just one more reason to feel like I don't belong.

Ugh, this was such a pointless post...but it was really bothering me. :/

Happy ending(s)?

I feel like everything is changing so much right now. Nothing is how I pictured it would be years ago. All these people are different, all these places are changing, and all my memories are fading. My heart has been hurt too much in these past 2 weeks. I feel like everything is being shoved into my arms all at once, and I just can't take it. I need a break. I need to just get away. But I'm babysitting all summer, and the only time I can escape is when my family goes to Florida in August. I hurt so much right now.

Gah, I'm so emotional. I love blogging.

Happy 4th of July, everyone! Don't blow yourselves up. :)

<3

Dear Hollywood (and The Society Based Off It);

What the heck is going on over there? Have you all become vastly aware of how incredibly unimportant many of you are? Sure, there are a few people who will be worth remembering because of what they brought to movies, or music, or television.

Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and even Billy Mays were bigger idols for their work than most of you will ever be.

Over the past few days, I've found myself reading celebrity news a lot more than I ever have. I'm following the whole Michael Jackson ordeal and I wore blue in honor of Billy Mays yesterday. But while reading all the new articles coming out about these people, I'm finding myself incredibly disgusted with the whole idea of Hollywood, fame, and fortune. The paparazzi are being relentless with the whole MJ event, talking about the "real" parents of MJ's kids.

Those kids' real dad was Michael Jackson. He raised them from birth. He tried to make sure they were happy while also teaching them manners and showing them parts of the world they needed to see. (Many of the photos where MJ is out with his kids are from charity events.) I read an article about the man who had to relay the news of their father's death to the children. They screamed and cried, Paris specifically saying, "No, Daddy, no!" She's 11.

Jon and Kate (of the Plus 8 variety) have also made me feel sick to my stomach. They literally just renewed their vows "to show their kids that they'll always be together." The fact that they're divorcing and that Jon is excited about the possibilites is twisted and sickening. Those 8 kids have just become a part of a terrible statistic.

I'm just so freaking disgusted with society right now. I'm sort of just cutting this blog off, but I can't stand to think/write about it anymore. It makes me sad and angry and sick.

Bye June! <3

PS: Because I KNOW the first paragraph could eat me alive later-- No, I'm not saying I'm any more important than those silly celebs. I'm saying they're just as insignificant as us "regular people" and that they're human too. Michael Jackson died, and therefore, anyone can. The End.

Away We Go!!

This movie looks freaking amazing. I saw the huge ad on YouTube, so I watched the trailer. I really liked the song they used for it, so I went to the official website to see if it had a music player.

HOLY COW. The music is AMAZING. Seriously. You have to go listen to it. Right now. But the movie only came out in select theaters, none of which are close to me. Sad face! :(

On a more serious note, RIP Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. You were both very talented and many people are in mourning. You've touched many lives and I hope you knew that you were loved by a lot of people. My recommendation: Listen to "Man in the Mirror" by Michael Jackson. One of my favorite MJ songs. :)

<3

The Sniffles

I feel so...broken right now. I just feel like there is so much wrong in the world, so much wrong in my life, and so much wrong in a fictional tv show. My heart is broken and I feel helpless.

And so incredibly alone.

I've cried more in the past few days than I have all year.

*deep breath*

<3

Slight Breakdown (In the Name of CHANGE)

So I returned earlier today from the first part of my freshman orientation at the university I'll be attending in the fall (CNU Captains woop woop!!) and came home to realize that this Sunday is my pastor's last one with our congregation.

Now to clarify: Pastors moving churches is fairly typical in the United Methodist Church. However, I've only really attended a church since I was 10. And the pastor that is leaving has been here throughout my high school career and is the one, I believe, who helped me become the person I am today.

The thought of telling him goodbye KILLS me inside and I just know I'll end up in tears on Sunday. And it'll be embarrassing because many people will be happy to see him go (I don't know why, he's the most Godly man I've ever met).

Freshman orientation was an overall positive experience and my schedule ended up working out (I'm taking a PHIL 200 level course!!) and I never got a roommate which meant dorm to myself! But it's just really hard for me to be going through all these changes at once.

The three changes that should never happen within the same week: High School Graduation, College Freshman Orientation, and a Cherished Pastor Leaving.

PS: Stolen by Dashboard Confessional is LOVE. <3

Bittersweet endings.

So yesterday was Graduation. The ceremony was alright and I never really got emotional during that. Then it was my Graduation party and cool people came and gave me presents. I loved loved LOVED BA, Soph, and Lil A's gift. It was wonderful and the letters made me cry! And I got tons o' money.

And I know this is probably because I'm PMSing, but whatever. I had this dream last night that I totally kissed a certain boy in this cramped truck (I have no idea why). And I woke up the instant after it happened and wanted to cry.

Marissa's party was fun. I laughed a lot. Took some of the bitter away from the bittersweetness.

I am a JF alumni. And a college freshman. OMG, I love it.

I think...

"That sense of finality."

Oh yeah, it hit me yesterday.

I cried after watching what had to be a kindergartener get off the bus.

Cause I realized I'm done. I'm never going back to that school again. I won't ever be subjected to this town's cliques and scenes. It's an odd, unsure feeling.

Kind of like everything's spinning out of control? And it's hard to catch your breath?

Inspired (Ben Folds and 3 AM)

I don't think of you as often
as I used to.
You're a vivid memory,
but a memory
nonetheless.
I wish you the best
but I'm not sure
I'll miss you.
Which is selfish
and wrong because
I always hoped
you missed me.
I tried to talk to you
as often as before.
But despite the fact
that you aren't far away,
you are far away.
Would you see me off?
In my dreams
at the very least?
I miss our dream
touches and kisses.
The ones that were
never meant to be
in reality.
This is closure.
This is a
(temporary)
Good-bye.

Omegle Awesomeness

What is Omegle, you ask? Well, it's basically chatting with strangers. Seriously. That's it.

Anyways, today I talked to this guy. And everyone's all, "OMG ERIN, YOU'RE GONNA GET RAPED DON'T TALK TO GUYS ON THE INTERWEBZ!!1!one!!!eleven"

First of all, TURN CAPS LOCK OFF. Second of all, we basically talked about everything except where we live and our actual names. I just realized we don't know each other's names, haha.

The point is, he seemed really cool or at least interesting. It's refeshing to talk to new people once in a while. And sort of develops my ability to socialize with people. I get the worst feeling I'll have a hard time making new friends in college. I'm just so incredibly shy... Sigh.

I can't wait for college, despite being a little nervous.

OMGZ, DONE

Well, technically, I have to take my AP Stats exam. But that just means doing cryptograms and showing up and getting a 100. All about it. BUT ANYWAYS.

I need to find a song to sing Sunday night and I need to memorize my verse for Friends for Sunday. What to do...

I'm so ready for Graduation. I have so much stuff to do though! Ca-razy. Sitting to next to preggers tomorrow. :/

I hate alphabetical order.

The good news is that I'm cleaning out my friend list on Facebook. All those losers I was forced to go to school with will now turn into vague memories. It's fantastic.

And also skipping the stupid referral rooms to hang out with James in the band room. We're pretty badass. xD

Byes! <3

Sunscreen! (One Day Reflections)

I am not perfect.

I make mistakes. I'm sorry for being human and needing sleep.
I got a referral with 3 days left of high school.

WTF?!

Divorce

Jon & Kate Plus 8 completely broke my heart. I thought that this would be a couple that would last. Despite the screaming children, constant traveling, money troubles-- I thought they would last.

But perhaps what is most upsetting is that just last season they renewed their vows! They have 8 children, spoke about how they wanted to show their kids that they would stay together.

A scandal and a few headlines later and it's all down the tube?

I just don't think that's how marriage should work. When there are 8 children who are sensitive and need affection from two grown-ups, divorce just can't be a reasonable option.

The whole thing just upset me greatly.

Sigh.

Optimism: 4-day school week!

To Seniors:

Have you gotten that "feeling of finality" yet? Cause lately I keep seeing how life will be after I leave high school.

Watching BA, Soph, and Little Ashley hanging out without me just really...opened my eyes. That's how it's probably gonna be next year. I'll be off at college, hopefully making friends, while they stay here and continue on innocently.

I picture Ben chilling at home alone, his friends always hanging out over here and him going out with his girlfriend a lot more.

And then the Messengers at practice, no teens with them. All of them middle school or younger.

Don't get me wrong, I'm excited for college. I just feel like I'll end up in the same situation as Carmen (SotTP) with maybe one friend who enjoys torturing me.

Cheese is no substitute for Chocolate.

Hi, my name's Erin.
And I paint my nails now.
I wear dresses and flip flops.
And rings.

Who would've thunk it?

Sigh.

I am totally conflicted now. Conflicted in the sense that I know what I'll probably end up doing, but it breaks my heart to do so.

I had just decided on going on the chorus trip and now I probably can't go because I'm supposed to sing in church next Sunday. But I already told my teacher and friends I was going on the trip, but I also told the church I would sing and my heart hurts.

And then the "Night with the Messengers" thing is the same night as the Senior dinner and I don't know what to do. All I know is that I realllllly want to cry.

My heart can't take it. :(

Now I can be...

...a true hero! A champion of the faith! Now I can be a true hero! And serve God all of my days. <3

The Messengers and I had our play today. We all did really well and all the adults said we did wonderfully. Although I must admit, I got the worst urge to cry during "Deborah." As soon as Abby ran out as Barack attacking the Canaanites I got a frog in my throat and tears welled up in my eyes.

I'm going to miss them all so much! I don't know how I can bear to leave them. They're just....the best people I've ever met. I adore them. And now happy but also very sad tears are welling up.

Back to the 80s was...good? :x

I survived!

My name is Erin and I survived 4 AP exams in the span of 2 days!!

I'm quite pleased with myself.

PS: I live to the song "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane right now. And Blood Diamond is a frick-awesome movie!

Best Weekend Ever!!

So this weekend was a lot of fun. :)



Friday: I babysat Daniel and Andrew in the morning (and made some moolah!) which was super easy. I'll be making the easiest money everrr this summer. Speaking of which, I need a new camera and some of those sweaters from Old Navy. And some band shirts.


Saturday: Went to the Mother-Daughter Tea with Mom, Grandma, Aunt Amy, and Norah. We ate food and went outside and had our pictures done. The one to the right is my absolue favoritest of Norah. Amy said she looked like Rapunzel, but with short hair.




Sunday: I went to Sunday School were we blew up balloons. And then we had church where the Messengers sang "Arky, Arky." It was super good, though Caitlyn and I had a little bit of trouble trying to hold on to Zachary. Then I went home and baked cookies for the Youth table-- the miniature Youth Cave. We made s'mores and had Pastor Ken's little pop-up igloo, haha. Then Cait and I left for messengers. We practiced for that. Then during the 10-minute break, ran to get food. It was delicious. Then we ran back and practiced our duet to sing in church. Practice finished, and we went to jump on the bouncy thing for a while. And then we kind of returned to our station for a few minutes. And then it was time to set off the balloons. It was-- incredible! I seriously could not explain how wonderful it truly was. And then they announced prizes where we won "Best Youth Table." The fact that we were the only youth table is of no importance. And then we fit 7 of us kids into the pop-up igloo. And finished off the day with a bounce. :)

In short: Sunday was the BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.

Rooftops.

Fin.

Hello there last day of BEDA. This last post will literally leave me in tears. I'm not even joking. Just beacuse I never realized how much stuff can happen in a month.

I talked about boring stuff like books and movies.
I listed my Prom wishes and witnessed half of them come true (the practical ones).
I wrote about my friends and gave examples of our many jokes and debates.
And I even included a few pictures along the way.

I feel I have changed in the last month. I feel the same way when I look at my blog from freshman and sophomore year. I'm honestly astounded.

I had a bunch of homework and a bunch of social events and a bunch of family stuff.

And I'm glad that I'll have this month recorded for me to remember.

PS: I'm probably going to continue blogging, just not every day. <3 :)

Amid the Seem

Went to my school's talent show tonight. Sat with the chorus peeps. Who I love very much so. :)

But anyways! I mostly went to see Bobbi Anna and "the boys." Also known by their band name, Amid the Seem. They were the last group to go and they were seriously the best act of the night. I know Bobbi Anna can sing, but she literally blew me away tonight. And they only got 3rd place! Ridiculous!

Anyways, since tomorrow's the last day of BEDA, I will include an emotional rant about this month and whether or not I will continue blogging. (I'm already missing BEDA. How lame!)

Lalalala--

BYE!

<3

Caps & Gowns

Fcts:
-- My 'a' key has been failing miserbly as can be seen by the spelling of some of those words.
-- I have too much AP Gov work to do by Thursday. For example, that book report on the book I never red.
-- I am super tired.
-- Into the Woods is BALLIN.
-- Allergies suck.
-- I got my cap & gown today. I can feel Graduation in my bones.
-- I'm procrastinating...

Byeas!

Freaking Teeth

So I went to the dentist. Apparently, by bite has caused erosion on the backs of my upper teeth and I have a few tiny cavities forming because of it. They talked about filling those in and using flouride to rebuild my enamel. But they also said I will need to have a night guard for my teeth so that they don't keep eroding.

I've never had braces and only gotten compliments about my teeth and now this happens. FML!

And I have a buttload of work to do this week and AP testing next week. As in, next Monday and Tuesday, I have to be in my testing area by 7:45. The exam begins at 8:00. I am so freaking close to a mental breakdown.

AGH. SO MUCH BAD STUFF.

But I like to end on a positive note, so here's some good stuff:

Allergies and Heroes

So the past two days have made me feel all gross and nasty cause my allergies basically did the equivalent of punching me in the face. My nose is completely stuffed and I have this pinpoint of sinus pressure between my eyes. It sucks SO BAD. I have a headache, my body is sore, and I don't have the right attitude to deal with all the work I still have to do over the next 2 weeks. Nyugh.

So now I'll do summaries of yesterday and today!

Yesterday: I woke up at 7:20ish AM to go work with Christmas in Action. Basically, you go and work on a needy family's house in the area. My parents and I stayed there until a little bit after lunch. I love all those people a lot more than I probably should. And I didn't know the Goetz's were moving! Sad face. And then I went home and took a nap cause I was freaking TIRED. Woke up and got ready for my Girl's Night Out with some of my favorite girls. I slipped into my prom dress and was on my way to Texas Road House! We shared a lot of funny stories and talked about college and life. I ate so much food, I was in pain! And then we went to get ice cream at Mountain Frost. And freaking Kaitling put on an apron and went to work! What a loser! JK, Kaity Doc. And then I went home and went on the computer some and fell asleep.

Today: Woke up and went to Sunday School and Worship. Messngers sang today AND I had to usher, so I spent a good amount of the service not in the actual sanctuary. Odd... And then sat in the car with my dad and complained about all the pain I was in until Mom FINALLY came out from her meeting. Went home and had lunch. Then took a nap and woke up and left for Messengers practice. We practiced a few songs, one of them being the one we'll sing on Graduation Sunday. I swear I will be a blubbering mess when we do it. I'll probably use their hair to dry my tears. Haha, jk. We then began working on the play, concentrating on lines first and then music and then ran as much as we could before 6:00. We stopped right before my solo (thanks goodness). And then I went to Youth Group and ate pizza and ice cream. It was rally night with The Kirk and a couple other churches. We talked about 1st Corinthians and discussed quite a bit about speaking in tongues. It was really interesting and enjoyable, even though it did run over a little bit. And then I came home and began all the work I didn't have time to do earlier. Still working on it, actually.

4 day school week. Then AP exams. And then my brain will be shutting down.

PS: April flew by. I can see BEDA coming to a close. But I think I'll probably keep up with this silly thing. :)

Letters

This blog will serve as letters to friends who shall not be named. They don't know this is about them. GO!

Dear _;
I feel like I don't even know you anymore.

Dear _;
You are the first person who has accepted everything about my personality. It's like you came in at the perfect point in my life. You are awesome.

Dear _;
I'm glad we had tonight. It was the first time in a while I felt like your friend.

Dear _;
You are a light. Keep shining.

Dear _;
I don't plan on hanging out with you anytime soon. Sorry.

Dear _;
I don't want to see you after Graduation.


Love,
Erin

Once Again [Late]

Yeahhh...I'll be up to speed by tomorrow? Promise?

Anyways, today was pretty extraordinary. For one thing, we had a pep rally at school. I got to see the winter drumline show and it was sooo good! But other than that, pretty blah pep rally. Then I had an after school review session where it was just me and Luis, hah. And in AP Gov today we filled out our AP answer sheets. Did I mention I'm taking 4 AP exams this year? And that they're all crammed into 2 consecutive days? Yeah, major suckage.

And then tonight, my Relay for Life team showed an Alfred Hitchcock film at the baseball field across from my neighborhood.I saw quite a few of my friends there (and some people I had not expected at all) and had a lot of fun. What was interesting was that when I laid back once, I just looked up and was amazed at how beautiful the stars are. Everytime I look up at a clear night sky, I'm always taken aback by it. It's just-- magical, really.

And I walked home afterwards! And managed to not be killed by any cars. :)

CIA and GNO tomorrow! And book report for AP Gov...

GRUMBLEGRUMBLEGRUMBLE!!

Late [at night]

Yeah, I know, I technically didn't post yesterday. But I'll post it now since I'm sleepy but don't want to sleep. Conflicted! I feel so busy and overwhelmed with everything that's happening. We had a Senior Social today and I've had so much work from all my AP classes. And when I do have time, it's spent at Messengers or school doing review sessions or church or after school choir practice or maybe television.

For example, I missed out on hanging out with friends because of an appointment. I have so much stuff and I'm taking 4 AP exams in a week and I just want to cry.

And that book report for government is just looming over my head and I want to SCREAM!

Is it summer yet? Cause then I can just hang out with friends, babysit for money, and read books I want to read.

Gahhhhhh. Oh, blog. How I love thee.

Not enough time!

I was so busy today! I had school, obviously. But then I also had to stay after for a choir thing where I didn't have time to complete any school work. We didn't perform until 7:15 and I didn't leave the school until 7:40. And now I have to finish my 41-PAGE BRIEFING PAPER.

I shouldn't complain so much. Hey, maybe I'll put up a picture today! Good idea, Erin! Brilliant!

Oh hai. It's me and Beth! She's pretty fly.

PS: My pastor is awesome. He wrote a letter talking about the service hours I need for a stamp on my diploma and he said the nicest things about me. I appreciate it so much! Seriously, no one has any idea. And my Sunday School teacher hurt his back. Prayers!

I am smart.

Don't mean to sound arrogant, but it's actually true. I am very intelligent. But I fail to apply myself and end up procrastinating or not doing stuff at all. It's bad habits that started when I was in 9th grade and started hanging out with people more and stopped doing all the school stuff.

All that aside, even though I hadn't even thought of applying there until this year, I'm really happy with my choice of college. Christopher Newport is super nice and it's a good morally sound university. I'm excited about the opportunity and I think things like this happen for a reason.

And I really adore my pastor. He is willing to do so much for me. One of the best people I have ever known. EVER.

PS: Busy tomorrow night. D:

Important (and not so important) Things

So today represents many things. It's Pot Smoking Day (which I'm sure the druggies in my Religion and Philosophy class appreciate) which is whatever to me. It's a couple people I know's birthdays...

But today is also the 10 year anniversary of the Columbine massacre. When it comes to tragedies like Columbine, Virginia Tech, and 9/11, I believe in looking at videos of the events and remembering the people who have died and suffered. It just makes you think and appreciate life more. I think.

But everyone's entitled to believe what they want (at least in Amurica).

R.I.P. all victims of school shootings. They're terrible, really.

<3

Memory Loss Problem

I seriously forgot about this until-- JUST NOW. And there are 19 mintues left in the day!

I have a serious memory problem.

I don't know what to say.

Oh, back to school tomorrow after Spring Break. Less than 2 months until Graduation. 2 and a half weeks left of actual work. High school is almost over. Holy cow.

HOLY COW, I'M GROWING UP.

Fashion Wants/Needs (Or lack thereof?)

I want to get a few band shirts/random graphic tees. And then Old Navy has these cute cropped sweaters that come in a bunch of different colors so I could just mix and match.

Do you see the possibilities?! It'd be so adorable. T-T

Alan's Video Idea!

fallofautumndistro came up with the greatest idea ever.

He gives you 88 jump cuts to mix and match however you please to create your own version of a vlog. It could entertain people for hours, I'm sure. I made a quick one right away cause I was pretty super excited. It's so much fun!

Alan and Craig are geniuses.

YouTube = LOVE.

"Cousin Bonding"

So the family outing I referred to in the last few blogs was about my traveling to Richmond to babysit-- er, "bond"-- with my cousins Noah and Norah. Noah is 12 and perfectly capable of entertaining himself. But Norah is 5 and a screamer and a cryer and child that constantly needs attention. The first day I kept thinking, "Norah has the cutest laugh ever!"

I no longer believe that. I'm sure it's just as cute as it was 3 days ago, but I am forever scarred by this past babysitting experience.

I am seriously considering never having children.

2 more blogs will be up before the night's over.

Promise...?

So I've recently become obsessed with Rhett & Link, the dynamic songwriting duo from YouTube. They seem like genuinely nice and hilarious people. Not to mention that they're from North Carolina, where I used to live. I love it. A real example of real people with talent made well-known thanks to YouTube. They totally deserve the fame, in my humble blogging opinion.

I leave to visit family in a few hours. So I dunno, as I said yesterday, how the blogs will work. I will definitely be caught up on Saturday.

Spring Break has made me realize how much I can't wait for Graduation/summer vacation/college. I am ready to be out of here!! :)

Barely made it!

So today was fairly boring. I sat around, slept a lot, and read some of Dracula. Yeah...I actually did schoolwork. Crazy!

So I'm officially realizing how much I'm gonna miss certain people next year. I honestly don't know what I'm gonna do without Beth next year. I mean, she's like...always been there. It will be super weird.

And yeah....I'm boring. Also, I will be visiting family the rest of the week. So I'm not sure when/if I'll be able to post. If all else fails, I'll post a bunch og blogs on Saturday.

Toodles! :)

Culture Deprivation and New Marketing Techniques

My town has a very sad mall. This mall is very sad when the economy is booming. When there's a mass recession and everyone here is in danger of losing their jobs... it's just depressing.

So my family and I went to the Roanoke mall which has a lot more stores and ones that are actually fairly modern. The only downfall is that they're also more expensive. But my mom saw that we really needed some updates to our wardrobe and therefore bought me an outfit from A&F. My first outfit from shopping there. Yeah, this is the "cultural deprivation" the title refers to. We also went to see Knowing (the new Nick Cage movie) at the Roanoke theater. It was freaking sweet. Did I mention that our town's theater(s) suck? No? Well, they do. They suck hard. (That's what she said.)

And then my mom wanted to go into a Birkenstock store. There was a cat in it! He had a bell on his collar and just walked around the store. It was awesome! I love cats. :)

Happy Easter/Zombie Jesus Day!

So today is Easter. It is without a doubt my favoritest family get-together every year. We eat together and have a huge easter egg hunt for the "kids." (Truthfully, many people hunt for the eggs until they are in their 20s. We're open-minded.) There's always at least 10 dishes of deviled eggs. There's a lot of desserts too. But mostly I get to hang out with distant (and not-so-distant) relatives. It's lots of fun. I love it mucho. <3

So Many Bojangles...

So went to see the paternal side of my family today. They live in southern Virginia and we literally passed like 4 Bojangles. So freaking southern. :p

Anyhoo, I played with the puppies there: Bindy and Goldie. And played wiffle ball with the cousins and such. But then it got cold and we went inside. And we had cake for my aunt and uncle's birthdays. Delicious.

And I've seen TB out driving a lot recently. I mean, he lives down my street and he's in my Government class. But I haven't seen him outside of the whole school environment in a long time. It's odd and awkward and makes me wish he never moved here. I am terrible, I knoooow.

Ahem. Anyways. Tomorrow's Easter! Can't wait! :) <3

One Voice

So Fridays are usually awesome because of how much time I get to spend with the (good) people in chorus. We have an after school session for 6 of us that are actually good. My two chorus besties are in it and we are awesomeee. Plus, we also sometimes have movie night with BA and Soph. However, BA couldn't come so it was just me and Soph.

I've never had so much fun in my life. It's like everytime, it gets better and more hilarious. I can't believe it! We watched Office Space, one of my old musicals, and Friends. We also played Twister and failed miserably. And ate too much sugar. As always....

The point being, I will actually miss Movie Nights with BA and Soph. They have been beacons of light in an otherwise gloomy life.

:)

Chicken Nugget Day

So my lunch table has been having some pretty intense discussions over the past few days.

INCLUDING:
Pancakes vs. Waffles
N*SYNC vs. Backstreet Boys
High School Cafeteria Food vs. Other Cafeteria Food

I was on team Pancakes, BSB, and OCF.

Anyways, I would also like to share some in-jokes from my zero period class last year.

Funny Stuff:
Lord Baltimore (Voldemort)
Muryland, Native Amuricans
Bear Arms
Jesus

We had fun in that class. I love those geeks.

Addendum: One of my friends (who I had really hoped to escape) is going to the same college as me. FRICKITY FRICK.

Passed Over

Passover with my friend and his family and their other guests was really interesting and a lot of fun. It was really funny, because when you're waiting for Elijah, the doorbell rang, haha. It was awesome.

I am currently watching As Told By Ginger. It is amazing. And I am sleepy. Night. <3

ps: Another blog entry after school today. PROMISE.

Shiznit.

Sorry for no blog yesterday. My parents took my computer away. I have managed to get it back and will therefore post 2 blogs today. To make up for yesterday. Here we go.

This Blog's topic: Judaism!

I am not a Jew. I'm a Christian through and through. However, a Jewish friend of mine invited me to Passover tonight! I accepted wholeheartedly, and it's possibly the only time my parents have let me go out on a school night since.... freshman year. Mostly because it's religious/educational. ANYWAYS. I'm really looking forward to it and can't wait to eat food that is Kosher. Also, Matzah is delcious. Silly Jews. :)

Mondays

I have generally hated Mondays with a fiery passion. They have always meant the end of the weekend and a big fat headache by the end of the day. Today I was also bombarded with the tiredness associated with Prom.

But recently Mondays have actually been okay. My headaches have subsided, and for the past few months, I had Secret Life to watch. But now I am tired, sore, and have nothing to watch.

Luckily for me, I managed to find downloads of the old Nicktoon "As Told By Ginger."

Now this show is fantastic. Ginger is one of the most relatable characters Nick has managed to create and in the form of a cartoon! It's ridiculous! Amazing, but ridiculous! I do not understand why all the amazing shows from my day were cancelled. Blasphemy, I tell you. BLASPHEMY!!

And now I leave you to finish watching the Camp Caprice special.

The Aftermath.

Prom/After Prom was lots of fun! I got to hang out with all my good friends and everyone looked pretty and we all looked tired by the time 3 am rolled around. I love all those people more than I should. <3

Anyways, here are a few stats from my Prom.

Most Popular Dress Color: Blue.
Prom Queen and King: Cameron and Mark.
The Music: Rap, bad and old slow songs, and Brickhouse.
Favorite moment: When BA and I started singing to each other from across the room and then met in the middle and had a mini dance off. It was sheer epic. :)
Favorite Inflatable: The obstacle course!
Favorite Kodak Moment: Me and Beth next to the inflatable. :)

And now I leave you. Maybe I'll do something productive....

Senior Prom

Tonight is my Senior Prom. For today's blog, I will list my wishes for the "Best Night of My Life."

WISHES:
1. That the dinner beforehand goes well.
2. That I am able to get in my bloody dress.
3. That I do not break one of my ankles trying to walk in my heels.
4. That I dance as much as possible.
5. That one guy would ask me for a freaking slow dance.
6. That we do not die in a fiery car crash at any point tonight.
7. That I take part in every inflatable whatever at After Prom.
8. That the Elvis impersonator is there again.
9. That I win one of those godforsaken prizes!
10. That I am able to collapse in my bed and fall asleep immeadiately.

BAM. Now I have to eat something. And then hair. And then getting everything ready. Then off to a friend's house for dinner/getting ready/pictures. Then Prom. Then After Prom. Then SLEEP. End.

I choose you, Mhmm!

This week has been bothersome and tiring. I had to stay after school Tuesday-Friday. That is too much extra school time. TOO MUCH. It should be illegal.

So tomorrow is Prom. I'm kind of excited, but this latest dress issue has me bothered. I really hope I can fit into the freaking thing tomorrow. BUT ANYWAYS.

Today's Topic: Pokemon!

Holy crap, I have like re-discovered my love of this... entire idea, I suppose. The original tv series was amazing, though I prefer the more recent games. And I just-- Ahh, it's just a good solid way to completely waste time. And as a Grade A Procrastinator, this is what matters most.

Random Note: Sling Blade is awesome.

And it's late and I have a big day tomorrow and will need plenty of sleep. Night, all!

Books are awesome.

I don't know what to write/type about. I am an intensely dull person.
I know! I shall tell you of my favorite books.

Favorite Book series: Harry Potter!!
Favorite Children's Book: The Giving Tree. Dr. Seuss is no contest for this kind of excellence.
Favorite Pre-Teen Aged Book: A Corner of the Universe.
Favorite Teen Aged Book: Paper Towns holy freaking cow.
Favorite Book I've Been Forced To Read For English Class: The Catcher in the Rye. I love Holden Caulfield.
Favorite Book I've Personally Chosen To Read For English Class: A Prayer for Owen Meany. This is the book I did my literary analysis on. Freaking amazing.
Honorable Mentions: A Series of Unfortunate Events; Oh, The Places You'll Go!; The Thief Lord; Looking for Alaska; The Great Gatsby; The Old Man and the Sea; Pride and Prejudice.

I plan on reading a lot more books this summer. I'm aiming to read as many of College Board's 100 Books teens should read before college and few I've heard of on my own. I hope I get to read more in college.

Addendum: I can barely fit into my Prom dress. Prom is this Saturday. I am a fatty.

Introduction and BEDA

BAM. Hello, all! This is my new blog. Why? Because I enjoy talking to no one.

But seriously.

I'll be participating in something called Blog Every Day April (aka BEDA). In which I will post a new entry. Every day. For all of April. Clever!

Ahem. G'bye.