Odd Sleeping Habits

So it's really late and I should probably be in bed but I'm not. Because last night I slept really....strangely and I thought it'd be a good idea to blog about it!

Well, I was pretty tired last night because I've been working all week and I've had my church's vacation bible school. So I was tired and had music playing and finally sort of fell asleep. But the whole night was like an out-of-body experience. I was aware of my body lying there, and it felt like my body was absorbing the music and the sleep. I didn't really lose consciousness until I think 2 am...but I had been "sleeping" since midnight. It was very...odd. Like I wasn't awake or asleep, just....existing.

I'm weird.

You should check out: "Still Miss Us" by Damien Leith

<3

VBS Craziness!

Sorry I haven't posted a proper blog post in so long. I've been so busy with my job and my church's vacation bible school started Sunday night and I've been leading the 3rd-5th graders so I'm tired.

But our group is known as the Radical Rock Climbers! Woop woop! We're pretty....radical. xD

But I really do love those kids. I get so many hugs and attacks and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. <3

And the songs are really good this year! I like 'em I like 'em. :D

And my mom has walking pneumonia. I told her to go to the doctor! But does she listen? Nooo. but anyways. I'm off!

July Quotes

I've decided that I'll post a blog once a month with quotes that I have fallen in love with or that have deep meaning behind them or are just plain humorous. So I'll go ahead and post one and update everytime I find a new one. :)

"You can spend the rest of your life with me. But I can't spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on-- alone. That's the curse of the Time Lords."
-- The Tenth Doctor

"You can't love me! Our babies would be dogs!"
-- Sophia

"There are better things to do today. Dying can wait."
-- The Face of Boe

Change 2.0

All of those changes I was just scared about are in full effect now. Last weekend was our pastor's first Sunday at the church. People are already getting stuff for college, preparing to move out. I'm in tears just thinking about it. Everything, everything, everything. It's all changing and there's no stopping it. I've been crying nonstop it seems lately.

The other night, I was trying to go to sleep while listening to music (as I always do) and as soon as I shut my eyes and listened to the music, I started sobbing uncontrollably. And it wasn't even a song that meant anything! It was just a regular old song, and I broke down because of it. I obviously failed to sleep and had to turn all music off. I tried listening to happy ones, upbeat ones-- but they all made me cry harder. I don't know whyyyyyyy.

Bdubs, I'm offically obsessed with Doctor who. And the adorable couple of Ten/Rose. And I've been watching depressing tributes to them on YouTube. SO FREAKING HEARTBREAKING.

Behind These Hazel Eyes

That's not cliche at ALL....but moving on.

I never really thought about it until my biological grandfather died a few months ago (long story), but I'm the only one out of all my cousins that doesn't have blue eyes. I was just sort of in awe when I first realized this because I mean, what are the chances?! But then I became jealous and furious. I love blue eyes. I'm jealous of everyone who has them. My brother has them, a lot of my friends have them, and all the other kids in my family have them. Just one more reason to feel like I don't belong.

Ugh, this was such a pointless post...but it was really bothering me. :/

Happy ending(s)?

I feel like everything is changing so much right now. Nothing is how I pictured it would be years ago. All these people are different, all these places are changing, and all my memories are fading. My heart has been hurt too much in these past 2 weeks. I feel like everything is being shoved into my arms all at once, and I just can't take it. I need a break. I need to just get away. But I'm babysitting all summer, and the only time I can escape is when my family goes to Florida in August. I hurt so much right now.

Gah, I'm so emotional. I love blogging.

Happy 4th of July, everyone! Don't blow yourselves up. :)

<3